I sit on the Family Advisory Council at Levine Children's Hospital. I was making a presentation for our sub committee Healthy Choices which after a slow start we finally found our focus. We decided to find outlets to help families of chronically ill children, or as they are coined at LCH frequent flyers. Each member of this committee has had a child with cancer and one was a family of a burn victim. We know what it is like to be in the hospital for a year or more and then on to scans, reconstructive surgeries and long term therapy. We know while the focus on our children was covered completely, we were, as parents, lost on how to take care of ourselves.
So to get to my tears. During the presentation speaking about Music Therapy I lost it. I felt the flow of almost two years of tears held back in the name of bravery start. There was no way to stop the flood gates. I was raw, exposed and the armor had cracked. Replaying the meeting I was most likely not graceful. Another time in my life I would beat myself up for my for a less than stellar performance, but not this time. When your child is sick it spills over everyone and you cannot avoid the toxic wave.
In the end our recommendations fell on a friendly ear and most will be put in place to help future families at LCH.
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