Humor and Cancer

Today while ticking off a long list of errands we were listening to NPR's program "HumanKind." Ironically it was about engaging humor while having cancer. Most of the guests were comedians, all of which proclaimed their ability to laugh through the treatments essentially saved their lives.

I remember after the initial shock of Joe's diagnosis we resorted to our usual sarcastic humor. But that fades when you see your child deteriorate daily, when you have to sign a power of health attorney, when you realize the last chemotherapy protocol wiped out all memories of his childhood and then hear the words, falling like bricks on your ears, "there is nothing more we can do". Watching your son, who read such great books as The Count of Monte Cristo, Don Quixote and Nietzshe for fun, be diluted to "The Carrot War" and only enjoying the pictures; finding humor is an incredibly difficult stretch.

Joe never had the feeling of being punished by his cancer, but in his last months he often asked why me, to which we never had the answer. It was the luck of the draw, a crap shoot and a one in a million odds that this ugly bone cancer would finally claim his life.

Do I think our lack of humor at the end did not save him, no I believe our love for Joe helped him die with dignity.